I was in Whole Foods Market the other day, perusing the macaroni & cheese options (Does anyone else take a perverse pleasure in buying a purely fake foodstuff from Whole Foods?) when the urge to consume chocolate ice cream with whipped cream overtook me with the force of an off-shore hurricane. I hurried to the freezer aisle, where lo and behold, a new brand of ice cream appeared before me: Green & Black’s Organic. Look at that packaging! So dark and mysterious! It just screams chocolate decadence. Plus, hey, organic. And only $.30 more than Häagen-Dazs. Organic is worth 30 cents, right? But a little voice in my head whispered to me in a sibilant Spanish accent, “This word ‘organic’. I do not think it means what you think it means.” Obeying voices in my head isn’t usually good policy, but this one seemed harmless enough, so I perused the ingredient list. Here it is:
Organic Whole Milk, Organic Whipping Cream (18%), Organic Sugar, Organic Dark Chocolate (12%) (Organic Cocoa Mass, Organic Sugar, Organic Cocoa Powder, Emulsifier: Soya Lecithin, Organic Vanilla Extract. Minimum Cocoa solids 60%), Organic Skimmed Milk Powder, Organic Cocoa Powder, Stabilisers (Guar Gum, Xanthan Gum, Locust Bean Gum).
Hmm. Guar Gum? Soya Lecithin? Are those food items? And what about Xanthan Gum? They all sound suspicious. So, I perused good old New Jersey-based Häagen-Dazs. Here’s the ingredient list:
Ingredients: Cream, Skim Milk, Sugar, Egg Yolks, Cocoa Processed with Alkali.
There’s a kind of poetry there, don’t you think? I know what all those things are (“Cocoa processed with alkali” is dutched chocolate.), and I’m happy to eat them. And so, with some rum-flavored whipped cream, I did.